Confessions Of a Recovering People Pleaser

Before I even begin to write this I was wondering “what should I write to make people read it?, what can I say to make people like it?, do I even want to be totally honest, people may not like it”. These questions, and so many more are known all to well to so many others like me. We are doing all we do with one thought in the back of our mind of “pleasing others”.

I am on a journey to find myself at the age of 31 (crazy right?), because I have been told my whole life who I am (labels). I have never known who I am because I have been molding that person based on who I think I should be. I have tiptoed through life more worried about what others are thinking of me (and what I do) then anything else. I don’t even think I knew loving yourself was a thing until a few years ago.

Right with these thoughts comes the well known, I am not enough. We all at times will feel like we are not enough. We are not thin enough, not pretty enough, not a good enough mom, wife, etc. I believe thats where people pleasing stems from. We feel like we are not enough so we do ALL we can do make others see us as someone we may not be.

We say yes to things CONSTANTLY because others “need us too”, or we think we will somehow earn points for something. We put others before us, wearing down our beautiful bodies thinking no one understands what we are going through. Add social media to it?! Constantly checking and wondering why things are not being liked or why someone you really don’t even like unfriended you. Changing who we are and depriving ourselves of things we love, because people share something that says its bad (insert diet cycling right?).

I am here to say I’m tired of it and NO MORE. You have permission to find yourself and FALL IN LOVE. It is not selfish, in fact when you become who you are meant to be you give others permission to shine too.

I was in such a deep depression for so long, because I sought my value in the opinions of others. I missed out on so much life out because of fear. I’m living proof that ANYONE can learn to love themselves. We can stop worrying about the things that really don’t matter. LIVE the life we were meant to live and LOVE ourselves and others with a love we can’t even fathom right now.

It’s not gonna be easy to do, change the thought patterns we have about who we think we are, or who we “need to be”. I am here to tell you, it is SO worth it. Your whole life will change, are you ready to join me on this self love and discovery beautiful?



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